With My Whole Heart Forever Read online

  Mr. Darcy entered the room and bowed. “I apologize that I was not available to properly welcome you to Pemberley, Miss Bennet.” He turned to his sister. “I have come to escort you both to luncheon.”

  “You will join us?” Ana asked, her blue eyes sparkling with pleasure.

  “I will. I had arranged to have a tray delivered to my study while we worked; however, I have since been notified that my steward has been delayed, and thus, I informed Mrs. Reynolds to set me a place.”

  As they moved into a small dining room, Elizabeth noticed Simons was stationed in the corridor. Mr. Darcy was taking the risk of Wickham’s presence quite seriously.

  Mr. Darcy pulled out the chair for Elizabeth, then for Ana. Outside the window, it was becoming quite dark. A maid scurried around the room, lighting candles. Ana jumped when thunder rumbled in the distance.

  “Was your steward a long distance from the house?” Elizabeth asked.

  “Yes, he was. With the storm gaining strength, I now must doubt he will be coming at all.”

  With the last course, Ana asked, “Do you play an instrument, Lizzy? After luncheon, I would like to show you the music room. Perhaps we can pick out a duet to practice together?”

  “I do play a little on the pianoforte, but very ill. I can never seem to find the time to practice. Not that I dislike indoor pursuits, but at heart, I guess I am more a student of nature. There is always something just outside the nearest window calling to me, tempting me to take a walk.” Thunder cracked a bit closer this time. “Except, of course, on days like this one.”

  Ana seemed distracted, staring at the window. Her brother cleared his throat.

  Ana took a deep breath, then said, “At times, I bring my drawing supplies or paints outside with me into the garden, or I bring my embroidery or a book. Would it not be perfect if we could take the pianoforte outdoors, as well?”

  “That certainly would encourage me to practice.” Elizabeth could not help but smile. “As for today, if you would not mind that we look for a song that has a less difficult part, I would be happy to learn a duet. It would make for an enjoyable afternoon.”

  “I will look forward to hearing it someday soon,” Mr. Darcy said. “Miss Bennet, earlier in the day, I posted a letter to my solicitor in Town, asking him to determine which of my relations owns Netherfield Park.”

  He had really taken her concerns to heart! Last evening, it seemed as if he did, but she knew all too well that most men pretend they are attending, but they really do not pay any mind to what any woman had said.

  Although she loved her father dearly — and he did consider her opinions — even he would have waited a week or longer before he got around to writing the letter. For instance, when Mr. Collins was coming for a two-week visit the previous year, her father had held onto his message for a fortnight until the day before the planned arrival, putting the household into a complete tizzy to get ready in time.

  However, Mr. Darcy acted immediately. Elizabeth’s heart swelled with appreciation. Her voice was thick when she said, “That was very good of you, sir.”

  He held her gaze for a few moments. It was not until he looked away from her that she realised she had been staring at him.

  Elizabeth blinked several times and looked down at her plate. She met him less than a day ago. How could he affect her the way he did?

  All was quiet for half a minute or so until Mr. Darcy stood and excused himself. “Regretfully, I have some business to attend to. I will check in on you in a couple of hours and join you for tea later, as planned.”

  He bowed and left the room.

  She looked at Ana, who was smiling like a cat who held the canary in its mouth.

  Goodness! Had Ana noticed her infatuation with Ana’s brother?

  “Are you ready to find something to play together?” asked Ana.

  “Yes, I would like that.”

  Darcy settled behind his desk and tried to concentrate on the columns of numbers he was supposed to review with his steward this afternoon. Lightning illuminated the room, followed closely by a loud crack of thunder. He stood, automatically going to seek out his sister but had second thoughts. Perhaps it would embarrass her if he did?

  Thunder rumbled once again. As he had told the ladies, his meeting would likely have to be put off until tomorrow. The storm also meant the search for Wickham would be delayed.

  Why was it the rascal always seemed to have luck on his side?

  If Wickham had seen how he behaved at luncheon a half-hour ago, the risk towards Miss Bennet would be doubled, at least.

  Thank the good Lord sanity prevailed, though he had been forced to run away like a coward to prevent making a fool of himself.

  He barely knew her and knew nothing of her family other than that her father owned an estate in Hertfordshire and her uncle ran a business in London.

  Some of his relations would suffer apoplexy if he married a lady with connections in trade. They expected him to wed a lady with a sizable fortune, connecting them all to other ancient, and if at all possible, noble families.

  If he chose his marriage partner poorly, they would cut off contact with him. That would not be good for Ana’s future.

  He had to control himself.

  It was unusual to find the need to remind himself of this, although when he was a youngster, he was likely to behave more impulsively than other boys. After more than his share of trouble, he had trained himself to think things through thoroughly, to the smallest detail, before acting. By the time he entered school, it had become essential to him that he be considered mindful, sensible, and practical. It became an ingrained part of his character, in public and in private. Level-headedness and composure became his reputation.

  What was it about this lady that caused him to completely ignore his personal principles?

  He already knew. It was as simple as the way her eyes sparkled when she looked at him, as they had done after his voicing the efforts he had extended in sending the letter to his attorney. One could not imitate such heartfelt appreciation.

  First, he had pined for her before even meeting her. Now, he found himself wishing he could make anything and everything she desired come to be.

  It was ridiculous.

  Why had he asked her to come to Pemberley every day until her family left the area?

  The ladies’ laughter drifted down the corridor, acting as a soothing melody to his soul.

  Ana was enjoying herself.

  What a pleasant change from the sorrowful music Ana had been playing only a few weeks past, along with her sulking and her inattention.

  Yes, Ana had been improving, but last night, she was smiling, laughing, and conversing as was her wont prior to Ramsgate. She wanted to remain at the ball even though he was leaving.

  And this morning… Ana had been so excited about the pending visit, she could barely stay in her seat at their morning meal. He had found he could not deny her when she asked to ride to the Johnstons’ farm so she could spend a little extra time with Miss Bennet.

  His study lit up with white light at the same time a crash reverberated through the house.

  That was close by!

  Rushing to the window, he noticed a tree near the rose garden had been struck by lightning. Flames flickered in the split of the now-divided trunk.

  Flashes discharged near and far, all around his property. Crashes of thunder rolled into each other, becoming indistinct.

  Darcy prayed all his tenants and staff were indoors and safe.

  The sky opened up; rain began coming down in sheets. He watched as the deluge extinguished the fire.

  He whispered a prayer of thanks and went to check on the ladies.

  Both Ana and Elizabeth jumped, hitting all the wrong keys.

  “That was the loudest one yet,” Elizabeth said.

  She could feel Ana trembling beside her. Was she afraid of thunderstorms, like her sister, Mary?

  The room filled with the bright, white light of several lightn
ing strikes in a row. Thunder rumbled on endlessly. The windows rattled.

  Ana was all-out shaking now, eyes filled with tears, just like Mary.

  Elizabeth rose and closed the drapes.

  “Why do we not move to the other side of the room, away from the windows?” Elizabeth suggested. “Do you have a deck of cards? Perhaps we can play a game?”

  Ana stood. Elizabeth steered her to a seating area more distant from the windows and purposely had her face away from them. She could see Ana was in no condition to tell her where to find cards.

  Another crack of thunder.

  A tear made its way down Ana’s cheek.

  Elizabeth removed a handkerchief from her pocket and handed it to her friend.

  “Ana, have I told you that I am the second oldest of five girls? I have one older and three younger sisters. Each is different from the other, and I love them all very much. Mary, who is two years younger than I, practices on the pianoforte every day and has always been quite sensitive to storms. It has always made me wonder if people with a particularly keen ear for music are more sensitive to sound in general, especially loud noises.”

  Despite the fact she was not certain Ana was taking any of this in, she continued speaking anyway.

  “If there is a storm, day or night, Jane, Mary, and I always huddle up together and play a game or tell amusing stories. Would you like to hear a story about me when I was younger?”

  Ana nodded and dabbed at another tear.

  “When I was about seven or eight years old, I felt the activities that were meant for girls to learn, such as embroidery and sewing, were dull. I had no interest in lace or silk or muslin. Taking beauty naps was definitely not for me. In fact, I will admit it: I was a tomboy. I wanted to do everything the boys did and nothing else. Whenever my sisters were sent to bed for a nap, I could never settle down, so I was permitted to go for a walk. Little did my parents know that, sometimes, I would meet up with the boys from the neighbourhood during my walks. I could climb trees the fastest of all and skip rocks the furthest on any pond. In a foot race, I always won, and…” Elizabeth smiled brightly. “…I always caught more fish than any of the boys.”

  Ana’s eyes widened, so Elizabeth knew she must be listening.

  Elizabeth continued, “I must say I was forever getting in trouble for tearing my skirts and getting them wet or muddy. So, I felt I should be allowed to wear trousers.”

  “No!” Ana exclaimed.

  “It is true! One of the tenant farmer boys sneaked me a thick work shirt and pair of trousers that his younger brother had outgrown. Before leaving the house, I would put them on under my gown, and when I met up with the boys, I would take a few steps off the path behind some shrubbery and discard my own clothes. When I was finished playing, I would put my gown on over my play clothes and stroll back into the house again.”

  Ana giggled. “Did it work?”

  “It did. I was able to continue this way for several months without getting in trouble for ruining my gowns, not even once. It was almost a miracle. However, one day, my mother overheard one of the maids speaking to the housekeeper. They were wondering how my dresses always became much dirtier on the inside than they were on the outside.”

  Ana covered her mouth with a hand. “Oh, no!”

  “Oh, yes. That, my friend, was the end of my trouser-wearing days.”

  Deep laughter came from the doorway. Elizabeth turned and found Mr. Darcy, arms crossed over his abdomen, leaning his shoulder against the moulding.

  Elizabeth felt her face heat considerably. How long had he been standing there?

  “I am sorry to have eavesdropped, Miss Bennet. I came to see how you both were weathering the storm. Normally, I would have made my presence known, but I found your story just too delightful to interrupt.” He bowed.

  Elizabeth’s face flushed again. He thought her story delightful, not disgraceful?

  “I forgot all about the storm!” Ana laughed.

  “Exactly as I intended,” Elizabeth said. “Just like my sister, Mary.”

  It was still raining hard, but the thunder was now in the distance.

  “Thank you, Lizzy,” she said. “You distracted me completely.”

  “You are welcome. And worry not; if any more storms move our way, I have quite a few stories left to tell.”

  Having satisfied himself that all was well, Mr. Darcy returned to his study.

  At tea-time, they reunited with Mr. Darcy in the parlour.

  The tapping on the glass from the rain increased in intensity once again. Elizabeth stared at the nearest window and pulled the corner of her bottom lip between her teeth. The torrent slowed at times during the day, but it had never ceased since Elizabeth’s arrival. She was beginning to wonder about the condition of the roads. Was it impolite to ask to return to the Johnstons’ now instead of waiting until later?

  Mr. Darcy’s voice broke into her thoughts. “Miss Bennet, with your permission, I will send a message to the Johnstons’ farm, notifying them that you will stay the night. I fear the road will be thick with mud after all this rain, making it impossible for the coach to get through.”

  Was her concern that obvious?

  “Yes, please, Lizzy. Stay?” Ana asked. “My brother read my mind. I was becoming nervous about your return trip, as well, and was just about to suggest you stay over. The wheels will get stuck in the muck, and you would end up having to walk the rest of the way.”

  “I would not wish to inconvenience you or your household. Perhaps I can ride instead of sending someone else? If he can make it through, I certainly can.”

  CHAPTER 14

  Darcy was shocked into silence. If he invited any other lady of his acquaintance to stay overnight at Pemberley, he knew full well that they would have accepted immediately. Miss Bennet was the most unconventional woman he had ever met, and yet she comported herself as a lady at all times. How did she manage it?

  Miss Bennet smiled mischievously. “Especially if someone lent me a pair of trousers.”

  Ana giggled.

  He held back a chuckle, but he guessed his amusement was evident on his face. “Was riding among your victories over the boys in your neighbourhood, as well?”

  Miss Bennet raised both eyebrows. “That is a story in itself, sir.”

  He would very much like to hear that story — and all her stories, if truth be told.

  “No matter how skilled you may be on horseback…” He purposely changed his expression to become more serious, trying to send her the message that Wickham might still be in the area. “I must caution you from riding. I have concerns other than the weather just now. Ana and I would never forgive ourselves if something were to happen to a guest after leaving our home when we could have prevented it.”

  He held her gaze for a moment. When he blinked, the intensity of her countenance softened.

  Was his attraction obvious? Did she welcome it? Was she affected by him, as well?

  Ana said, “Besides, Mrs. Reynolds keeps several guest rooms at the ready in the event we receive unexpected visitors, so it would be no trouble. We would enjoy having you as an addition to our evening.”

  “Thank you. I will stay.” Miss Bennet gestured to her gown. “But, I hope you shall forgive me for not changing for supper.”

  “I will not change, either,” Ana offered.

  Miss Bennet expressed her thanks. “Actually, it is a shame I cannot change, for I brought along quite a few gowns that I have not had an opportunity to wear during this trip.”

  Ana seemed quite interested in the subject. “Since you mentioned it, I have been wondering… it must have been difficult to adjust to such a different lifestyle.”

  Darcy sat back in his chair. He must control his countenance or else raise Miss Bennet’s expectations. Nothing could ever happen between them. But those eyes! Every time his gaze met hers, all rational thought escaped him, and he simply felt. If the ladies carried on most of the conversation, he would not have any further m
oments of carelessness.

  Miss Bennet said, “I think the most foreign practice of residing at the Johnstons’ farmhouse these past weeks is not having to alter my dress for every progression of the day. Although, I would not say it has been unwelcome for it has made me realise just how much of my time is spent in my dressing room. Otherwise, I would say I have appreciated being useful.”

  “The Johnstons have not put you to work, have they?” Ana’s mouth opened with shock.

  “They expect nothing from me, but I am not one to sit idle for long, except while reading.” She looked at Darcy. “As you found out at the ball, I had already gone through every bit of reading material in the house. You rescued me with a book from your excellent library.”

  She smiled at him, and his heart skipped a beat.

  He bowed his head slightly in thanks.

  She returned her gaze to his sister. “Usually at home, my sisters and I walk into the village of Meryton or make visits to my aunt and our neighbours. I often check in on the tenants of my father’s estate, and, of course, the tenants at Netherfield Park. Here, I have kept myself occupied, helping with the youngest of the Johnston children whilst their mother has been ill. I walk in the afternoons when the children are busy doing the chores they perform with their older siblings.”

  There was that playful smile again, which did such strange things to his insides.

  She said, “Although my mother would probably die of embarrassment should she discover it, I will admit to you that I learnt to make pies when visiting my friend who recently married and moved to Kent. While here, I have put into practice what I have learned.”

  Miss Bennet stopped suddenly. “Oh, but you know the place! Rosings Park. My friend married the clergyman, who lives at Hunsford parsonage. Is not his patroness, Lady Catherine de Bourgh, a relation of yours?”

  Darcy widened his eyes. “She is our mother’s sister. But how…”